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How NOT to Be a Bridezilla: 9 Helpful Tips

May 8, 2010

We’ve all seen the show, and when watching it most women might say, “I’d never act like that.”  Bossy, picky, moody, with loud, angry outbursts and everything being the bride’s way.  And why shouldn’t it be?  It’s their special day.  But there’s a big difference between being a bride and a bridezilla.  You want everything to be perfect, yes, but by becoming a demanding and over controlling woman, you tend to get on everyone’s nerves in the bridal party – as well as whoever else is helping with the wedding, and possibly even your fiancé.  So here’s some tips to avoid becoming a fire-breathing dragon, and remaining a cool, calm and collected bride-to-be.

1.  Even though this is your big day, you are not the center of the universe.  The people that are helping you also have their own lives, and not every minute of their time is going to revolve around assisting you in picking out just that right shade of lipstick, or arranging your 50 intricate centerpieces.  You have to promise yourself that you won’t become a bridezilla before promising everyone else.

2.  Prior to planning the wedding:  give your bridal party, family and fiancé permission to tell you when you’re acting over the top.  Then, actually listen to them when they tell you.

3.  Breathe.  It’s only one day of your life, and you’re planning it to be happy!  Not to lose your mind.  And yes, it only lasts one day.  Your family and friends, however, are there forever and you don’t want to push them away.

4.  Don’t act like you can handle everything.  You can’t.  Embrace everyone’s helpful offers. But don’t take advantage of them, either.  All good things in moderation.

5.  Yes, the little things do count, but you can settle for normal M&M’s rather than the ones with your picture on them that you waited too long to order.  You’ll end up giving yourself a coronary about something petty, like the fact that the marble accents in the floor of your reception hall don’t match your color scheme.

6.  De-stress.  Try boxing or hitting the gym hard to take out some anger when you want to wring your mother-in-law’s throat, or if the wedding favors you want are out of stock.  Even if you’re keeping your cool, but the stress is bottled up on the inside, you have to let it out!  Take a yoga class, get a massage, or go out for a drink with your girlfriends.

7.  Ask your fiancé for help…even if you don’t want him to.  Regardless if he says he doesn’t want to be involved with the planning, he might just be saying that to avoid doing something, and only displeasing you in the end.  He’s the last person you want to push away at this time.  If he really assures you that he doesn’t want to take responsibility for anything, hey, nothing lost, nothing gained.

8.  Stay practical.  You can’t ride in on an elephant with fireworks going off and doves released upon your entrance.  Or not all of it, anyway.  Not everything is going to be 100% perfect, so you have to accept that things will go wrong.  You can at least try your best to fix or change it.

9.  Try not to talk about the wedding plans after a certain time.  This also goes for thinking about the wedding plans too!  By doing this, you’re able to still have “you” time.  This also applies to your fiancé, family and friends.  You’ll also probably stay more sane by not thinking about it 24/7.

Hope this article gave everyone a little laugh.  Enjoy your weekend!  <3 Kelsey

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Erica is an 11 year veteran of the wedding industry and is the owner and founder of advice has been featured in the books: How To Plan Your Wedding and Enjoy It! Experienced Wedding Professionals Share Their Secrets and Planet Wedding.Follow her on Google +
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