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Are Wedding Toasts Out Of Date?

Nov 1, 2013

image credit: Charles Media Photography

Wedding toasts are a tradition you either love or hate.  Chances are you have been to one to many weddings where the speeches are long, boring or maybe a bit too over the top.   I got to thinking if wedding toasts were somehow out of date with the times after reading Offbeat Bride’s post that wedding speeches could die and no one would care.  Most guests probably wouldn’t notice – or even talk about it afterwards – that no one gave a speech.  It would give people more time to mingle, drink and dance.

And let’s face it, no one likes to give them.  Who wants to stand in front of a crowd and give a speech, knowing that the majority of the guests couldn’t care less about what you have to say.  Well, it isn’t about the guests.  It’s about the couple – the bride and groom who’ve asked you to say a few words, maybe a blessing for the future, or some advice.  You are important to them and hearing your words of wisdom is important too.  They’re not asking you to give a 20 minute power point presentation and research their lives (chances are you probably already know most of the juicy details anyway) but just a few short minutes (1 to 3 minutes to be exact) to let them know you care too.

Ehh… you’re still not sold on giving that speech huh?  I don’t blame you, I’m not a fan of them either.  I hate sitting through them and I get so nervous I could puke while giving them.  But my tone changed when I attended a friend’s wedding last month – her twin sister gave a speech that was so moving and funny that it changed my whole impression of wedding toasts.  So what did she do that was so different that it changed my mind?

  1. She spoke from the heart about her sister and husband
  2. She made a Top 5 list of things to keep Kristi happy – words of advice for her husband, Steve.  And anyone who knows Kristi, was laughing because it was hilarious.
  3. She congratulated them and toasted, it was short, sweet and sentimental.

The thing is, wedding speeches don’t have to be horrible or dreadful for you or the guests.  Just a few short sentences that express your love and well wishes is good enough.  I think we put too much pressure on ourselves to preform.  The fact is, just be yourself because that’s who the bride and groom love.  Because heartfelt sentiments never go out of date.

Do you think wedding toasts are out of style? Are you doing something other than a toast for gathering good wishes?  Share your thoughts on wedding toasting speeches below!

And if you’re preparing to give a wedding toasting speech, you may want to read our tips: Wedding Toasting: 15 Do’s and Don’ts for some helpful hints.

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Erica is an 11 year veteran of the wedding industry and is the owner and founder of LittleThingsFavors.com.Her advice has been featured in the books: How To Plan Your Wedding and Enjoy It! Experienced Wedding Professionals Share Their Secrets and Planet Wedding.Follow her on Google +
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